When I was a baby I had a lot of health issues with my heart which resulted in the doctors telling me I could never exercise, and the most I should do was walking. I spent most of my time in hospitals and wasn’t enjoying a normal childhood. Through my years at junior school, I was not allowed to participate in most sports and found this really hard. I felt completely left out and lazy and would get questioned every day why I wasn’t joining in. I think this led to me suffering as a teen with mental health issues. It got so bad I was taken out of school for half a year and that left me feeling isolated yet again.
One day, I decided that I was going to make my own decisions and stop living under this cloud of illness. I managed to find a passion in performing. Acting became my life and on the side, I danced and sang. I finally found something I could excel in.
I was honoured to get into several drama schools, and after a year of uni, realised that I didn’t want to be there I just wanted to perform. I have to say those years were some of the best years of my life. Meeting like minded people and getting to do my passion every single day! However, in the performing world, there was so much competition, anxiety, and pressure hidden beneath the surface. Gradually the pressure built and I found myself questioning whether the industry was for me.
It was probably the hardest decision of my life to put performing on the back burner and find a career that wasn’t as up and down. Still, to this day I miss it, but I found something that I was meant to do.
Fitness was never a big part of my life until I started dancing. I loved learning about the body, how we individually move and movement helped me clear my head. After leaving the acting world behind I was lost and coincidentally stumbled across a gym in Chelsea that looked very luxurious. I walked in, no qualifications, not a clue what I was doing and asked the boss if I could chat with him about potentially becoming a Personal Trainer and what courses he would recommend. He said, and I quote “I LOVE your personality and energy, go get your qualification and your hired!”. After the constant criticism in the performing world, I latched on to his compliment and went and got my qualifications and became a Personal Trainer in Chelsea. I learned more on that gym floor than I have ever learned before in my life!
My style of training is unique. I bring my dance background along with my love of the mind body connection together to create a functional method that is unique! In fact, I currently have been giving the nickname ‘The Band B***h’ as I think a resistance band is the best thing ever. So I was off training clients, loving my job and loving the fitness community.
Last year I was diagnosed with chronic fatigue, after fighting a horrible parasite on holiday. My whole world came crashing down. I couldn’t work, I couldn’t train, I could barely get out of bed. The most frustrating part was I finally felt I was excelling at something to then be knocked down again. AGAIN I was told by doctors I could not work or exercise and I must do nothing. Well, I stuck two fingers up at them and continued to work as much as I could, even though It was probably making me worse.
You know what though, having this horrible part of my life has made me understand how critically important it is to listen to our bodies. I don’t believe in overtraining, or dieting, I believe that exercise should be something that’s enjoyed, something that de stresses and builds self-love. Since then, I have left the gym in Chelsea and now have my own freelance clients, as well as being a blogger.
I know I will never be as strong as other people, or as physically capable. I will never be able to lift as much as others or run for as long as others. What I do know is that I am STRONG for picking myself up after every fall and continuing to work towards my dreams. In the future, I hope to help others to believe in themselves, love themselves and find a balanced lifestyle.
Lastly, two years ago I was brave enough to tell my doctor I was a personal Trainer. His face dropped and he was HORRIFIED, he then turned round to me and said “No one with your medical problems has EVER been able to do this before, well done” and that was when I realised how proud I was of myself.